It’s been 18 months since we separated and I can’t get you out of my mind, I still miss you, our memories still come up to my mind, how am I suppose to forget you and move on when I still see you all the time, the pain Is not the same but it’s constantly there. My heart aches, and my eyes water when I think about you. Tears are running down my face while I write about you, I can’t help it and I don’t think anyone would understand. You were once my happiness, you were my better half, and if you were to walk in the door at this very moment I would forget everything you’ve done, forget all the pain, forget all those words, because I know in a heart beat you would become my happiness once again. 

But I understand someone new has your heart, your heart is full when mine just has loss and pain. I understood that I got boring and my appearance changed, but I never once thought you’d break all those promises. You once said you would never love anyone how you loved me but yet again you learned to love someone even more than me. You put a ring on her finger and you never did to me, you always told me you were saving to get me the ring I deserved but materialistic never mattered, you were the one I wanted in any way or form, I accepted you for who you were but you never could accept me. 

Moana preview

I always believe that I should listen to what my brain tells me rather than what my heart wants but yesterday I went to go see moana and before the movie started, a preview came up and that preview was a cartoon, and basically that cartoon taught me that I should go after what my heart wants because in the end of the day my mind might make the best decisions for me but my heart leads me to my happiness it gives me what I truly want and desire, I just hate making bad decisions for temporary happiness

Cristian questions

It’s hard not to miss someone when you talked to them everyday for 6 months, but yet in my heart I knew I didn’t want him, I wanted someone else. I tried to move on to something better yet again I failed. Is something wrong with me? Am I not good enough? They say beauty is with in us but everybody is searching for it elsewhere. You touched my brain before you touched my body and that’s something I’ll never forget. You said you we’re different and I easily believed you. I gave you my trust when I haven’t trusted anyone in so long. I regret that too. What went wrong? Was I not what you thought I was, why’d you keep putting it on for so long? Maybe I couldn’t give you me, because I was craving for him to want me. I was doing everything I could to keep him, while I was loosing myself, maybe I should’ve done everything to be around you instead. Not knowing the answer, I still blame myself for the things that go wrong.